MindBeingWell Therapy and Wellness
Anaia Jolie, M.S.
Stigmas surrounding Mental Health unfortunately remain throughout the world. Luckily, voices against stigmas are increasing and spreading awareness to aid in the fight against mental illness. One of the most relevant issues today is the issue of silence concerning the mental health issues of men. I've Gathered a few interesting articles that deal with the issue of Men & Mental Health. Take a Read!
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10 Men Tell Us What They Wish Other Men Knew About Mental Health
Medically reviewed by Timothy J. Legg, PhD, PsyD on May 11, 2018 — Written by Julia Malacoff
Our culture doesn’t always leave space for men to express inner struggle. These men are trying to change that.
For men in particular, who’ve been told all their lives to “man up” and “be strong,” accessing mental health resources can seem to go against cultural expectations.
1. Society tells men that it’s simply not acceptable to have too many feelings.
“Men are taught from an early age, either by cultural referencing around them or by direct parenting, to be tough, not to cry, and to ‘crack on,’” says Dr. David Plans, CEO of BioBeats, who has done extensive research in this area. “We train soldiers and professional warriors, and then expect them to be emotionally intelligent enough to open up when they need help. Worse, we expect them *never* to need help. We must bring vulnerability, as a core principle of emotional strength, into the framework of masculinity.”
Essentially, experts say, the messages men receive as children and up through adulthood discourage them from ever letting anyone know they need help. Although thankfully, this is starting to change.
2. There are plenty of reasons men don’t seek out help, even if they need it.
“It can be very difficult to admit you are struggling as a man,” Alex MacLellan, a therapist and anxiety coach, tells Healthline. “Logically, you know that everyone gets down, has a problem from time to time, or finds it difficult to cope, but it often feels like you are the only person who can’t seem to handle it. You lie awake at night alone, wondering why you can’t be as in control as you should be and desperately trying not to let anyone else see how you are really doing.”
3. Sometimes, even if you know you need help, it can be tough to know where to start.
“I’ve experienced many men who do not want to ask for help because they’re afraid of looking weak or stupid,” says Timothy Wenger, a men’s mental health professional and blogger at The Man Effect.
“This is something I am working hard to change. I want men to know that their internal struggles are just as valid as any other struggle, and these do not make them less of a man. What I’m finding, though, is many men don’t know how to ask for help.”
4. And while finding a therapist is hard and may take some trial and error, it’s ultimately worth it.
“As the only child and son of a licensed professional counselor, you would think seeking therapy would be easy,” says A.D. Burks, author of “The 4 STEPS: A Practical Guide to Breaking the Addictive Cycle.”
“However, it was just the opposite! I thought, ‘What is a therapist going to tell me that I don’t already know?’ After considerable prompting from two close friends, I decided to schedule my first appointment. Unfortunately, that particular therapist wasn’t a good fit — prematurely confirming in my mind that I knew it all. Yet, I was still struggling with addiction. Thankfully, my mentor challenged me to visit a specific therapist. My initial visit to that therapist changed my life and ultimately helped me formulate the 4 STEPS.”
5. Plus, “getting help” can take many forms.
“It’s good to keep in mind that ‘asking for help’ isn’t always a laborious, difficult task,” says Matt Mahalo, an author and speaker who has dealt with his own mental health struggles.
“Sometimes, something as simple as a few hours trawling recovery stories and tips on YouTube can be enough to get you started on the road to recovery. Sometimes it just takes a simple trip to the library. For example, my first significant step forward happened while reading ‘The Art of Happiness.’”
6. People often feel a huge sense of relief after finally letting others know what they’re going through.
We’re on a mission to stop the suicide stats.
Every 40 seconds, we lose somebody to suicide. Healthline is on a mission to support people living with mental health issues and suicidality. Here’s how you can get involved.
This includes singer Zayn Malik, who recently went public about his experiences with anxiety and an eating disorder.
“I’m definitely glad I got that off my chest, as anybody is when you feel like you’re keeping something from someone. You have to speak about it and clear up the air,” he told Us Weekly in an interview.
7. Mental health issues are a lot more common than you may think, but by speaking up, some men are trying to raise awareness.
“I can tell you, I’ve probably had at least half a dozen depression spells that I’ve gone through. And the one in 2014, I didn’t want to be alive,” Michael Phelps told TODAY.
Considering that 1 in 5 U.S. adults experience a mental health condition in any given year, it’s crucial that these issues get normalized — and that’s exactly why Phelps made it a point to share his experience with others.
“You know, for me, I basically carried just about every negative emotion you can possibly carry along for 15-20 years and I never talked about it. And I don’t know why that one day I decided to just open up. But since that day, it’s just been so much easier to live and so much easier to enjoy life and it’s something I’m very thankful for,” Phelps said.
8. Mental health issues can be hard to really understand if you haven’t experienced them yourself.
In his song “In My Blood,” pop star Shawn Mendes confronts his personal experiences with anxiety, singing, “Help me, it’s like the walls are caving in. Sometimes I feel like giving up.”
Talking to Beats 1 about the song, he said, “It was kind of something that hit me within the last year. Before that, growing up, I was a pretty calm kid, super steady.”
He also noted that it can be hard to actually understand what people living with anxiety are going through until you experience it yourself. “I knew people who had suffered from anxiety and found it kind of hard to understand, but then when it hits you, you’re like, ‘Oh my God, what is this? This is crazy,’” he said.
9. The fact that celebrities seem to be more and more comfortable talking about their mental health is also encouraging, sometimes even putting a humorous spin on what living with a mental illness is like.
In 2017, Pete Davidson of Saturday Night Live opened up about his experiences with chronic depression and his recent diagnosis of borderline personality disorder.
“Depression affects more than 16 million people in this country and there’s no cure per se, but for anyone dealing with it, there are treatments that can help. First of all, if you think you’re depressed, see a doctor and talk to them about medication. And also be healthy. Eating right and exercise can make a huge difference,” Davidson recommended.
He continued with a smile: “Finally, if you’re in the cast of a late-night comedy show, it might help if they, you know, do more of your comedy sketches.”
10. All jokes aside, experts in this field have a hopeful outlook.
“As more men (especially those in the public eye) speak out about their struggles and experience with mental health difficulties, other men can see that the struggle is real and you are not alone,” says Adam Gonzalez, PhD, a licensed clinical psychologist and founding director of the Mind-Body Clinical Research Center at Stony Brook Medicine.
Why Many Men Have a Harder Time Seeking Treatment for Mental Illness
Written by Leah Campbell on June 30, 2019
We’re ignoring the stigma surrounding mental health that stops many men from seeking help when they need it most — and it’s literally killing them.
According to the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention, men died by suicide at a rate of 3.54 percent higher than women in 2017.
Mental Health America reports 6 million men are affected by depression in the United States every single year.
The National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism puts the annual number of men dying due to alcohol-related causes at 62,000, compared to 26,000 women.
And men are also two to three times more likely to misuse drugs than women.
Depression and suicide are ranked as a leading cause of death among men, and yet they’re still far less likely to seek mental health treatment than women.
The stigma men face
“I think part of it may be this macho thing,” Dr. Raymond Hobbs, a physician consultant at Blue Cross Blue Shield of Michigan, told Healthline. “A lot of guys don’t want to admit they have this problem. They still see depression as a sign of weakness.”
He was clear that this type of thinking is outdated, a relic of previous generations that doesn’t speak to the current medical understanding of mental illness.
“We know so much more now, and we recognize the chemical changes that take place. In many ways, mental illness is just like diabetes, or any other physical condition,” he said.
But Hobbs points out a lot of people don’t look at it that way. Instead they still see mental health struggles as a personal issue and a lack of personal fortitude.
Because of that, and the stigma that still exists surrounding mental illness (not to mention, the pressure on men to always be strong), a lot of men struggle with admitting they may need help.
“There is work for us to do as a society regarding the stigma of asking for help,” Zach Levin of the Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation told Healthline. “While we have done a much better job of reducing stigma and expanding opportunities for support, men still may be experiencing shame and guilt that could lead to them being less willing to ask for help.”
The burden of toxic masculinity
But it’s not just asking for help that men seem to struggle with.
ResearchTrusted Source has found that some men also have a harder time establishing social connections. The American Psychological Association has a podcast all about how masculinity can actually be a burden on mental health.
“When you’re talking about toxic masculinity,” Hobbs explained, “it really comes down to the way males are brought up. They way we’re taught to be strong and quiet. If you look at the old John Wayne movies, that was the model we were supposed to aspire to. But it’s also a model that is dysfunctional in many ways.”
This model of masculinity may be why men are more likely to underreport symptoms of depression. But certain, more traditionally masculine traits can also contribute to increased rates of depression, according to research Trusted Sourcethat’s found both negative and protective factors to traditional masculinity.
When the negative impact is an increase in depressive symptoms, substance misuse can often follow.
“If men are less willing to ask for help, they will continue to experience the symptoms contributing to depression,” Levin said. “Drug use is often a maladaptive coping strategy.”
As he puts it, when people struggling with depression, anxiety, and other mental health conditions aren’t embracing healthy coping resources, they may turn to alcohol and other drugs as a way to numb the pain.
The problem is, how do we as a society change men’s perception of seeking help before they get to that point?
Reducing the stigma
Levin says a lot of men fall prey to the false idea that they should be “tough enough” to fix all their problems on their own. They worry that by showing vulnerability, even in the case of physical illness, they may lose their authority with others.
As a result, “They may believe they can fix this problem quickly and move on to the next — and they may be in denial that there is a problem at all,” Levin said.
Addressing that, and helping men work past it, requires first ending the stigma of asking for help.
“We can all foster more transparency around mental health and substance abuse issues,” Levin said. “No one is immune to stress. Talking with others about how it is affecting you can foster empathy, camaraderie, and support — all of which fight against the feelings of isolation on which addiction and mental health issues can thrive.”
Hobbs believes a lot of this comes down to education as well.
“We need people to realize that these are medical problems, that there are good treatments available, and that there is hope involved,” he said.
Hobbs also wants people to know that untreated mental health issues can very quickly manifest into physical ailments, especially when people are self-treating with alcohol and other substances.
“Cirrhosis, gastritis, bleeding problems, actual changes that occur in the brain: We need people to realize that there is a real physical downside to long-term alcohol abuse,” Hobbs said.
For Hobbs, awareness and education play the biggest role in terms of what can be done to help people as early as possible.
“You have to talk to your loved ones. There are all these wonderful options available that can help, but first they have to be willing to try them,” he said
When is it time to ask for help?
If you’re worried that someone you care about may be struggling, or you think that you yourself need help, Hobbs says to look for these signs that indicate a need for outside assistance:
change in mood
difference in work performance
weight changes
sadness, hopelessness, or anhedonia (a loss of pleasure and pulling away from things that used to provide enjoyment)
physical symptoms, such as headaches and stomach issues
If you recognize any of these symptoms in a loved one, Levin recommends reminding them that asking for help can be a sign of strength rather than weakness, and that in 2019, we have a lot of resources available.
Try to schedule an appointment with a primary care provider or a substance use disorder professional (in cases where alcohol or other drugs are being used to self-medicate).
“It is much more palatable to propose a single appointment with a specialist to determine whether a problem exists than to propose the commitment of an inpatient or outpatient treatment program to your loved one,” Levin explained.
Still, if scheduling that appointment seems too daunting, he says that the Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation offers free, phone-based appointments and can be reached by calling 877-863-8045.
“There is hope. Help is available. Educate yourself about your or your loved one’s addiction and mental health issues. Participate in peer support groups or family support, such as Al-Anon, Families Anonymous, or a support group for families coping with addiction and mental health issues,” Levin said.
To treat this problem, we must get the message across that it’s OK to ask for help, whether for yourself, your loved ones, or anyone you think may need it.
And for those who have overcome mental health obstacles in their own lives, don’t be afraid to share your own stories. Sometimes reducing stigma means being willing to talk about the times we’ve needed to ask for help ourselves.
If you think you or a loved one may be in immediate crisis, call the National Suicide Prevention Hotline for resources and support at 800-273-8255.
5 Myths That Prevent Men From Fighting Depression
By Joshua R. Beharry | Mar. 23, 2018
Depression can be hard to talk about—so hard that a lot of men end up silently struggling for years, only to reach out when they’ve hit rock bottom. Others, sadly, don’t reach out at all. This is one of the reasons why men account for 3.5 times the number of suicides as women. And depression is one of the leading causes of suicide.
Fighting depression is difficult. Not only do you have to fight the illness but you also fight the stigma attached to it. For men, the fear of looking weak or unmanly adds to this strain. Anger, shame and other defenses can kick in as a means of self-protection but may ultimately prevent men from seeking treatment.
Here are some common myths that stand between men and recovery from depression:
Depression = Weakness
It cannot be emphasized enough that depression has nothing to do with personal weakness. It is a serious health condition that millions of men contend with every year. It’s no different than if you develop diabetes or high blood pressure—it can happen to anyone. We show our strength by working and building supports to get better.
A Man Should Be Able To Control His Feelings
Depression is a mood disorder, which means it can make us feel down when there is absolutely nothing to feel down about. We can’t always control what we feel, but we can do our best to control how we react. And that includes choosing whether to ignore our problems or face them before they get out of hand.
Real Men Don’t Ask For Help
Sometimes we need an outside perspective on what might be contributing to our depression. Consulting a professional who has more knowledge of depression and treatment options is the smartest thing to do. Trying to battle a mental health condition on your own is like trying to push a boulder up a mountain by yourself—without a team to back you up, it’s going to be a lot harder.
Talking About Depression Won’t Help
Ignoring depression won’t make it go away. Sometimes we think we know all the answers and that talking can’t help a situation. This couldn’t be further from the truth. Often, things that seem like a huge deal in our minds aren’t as stressful when we talk about them more openly with a friend or mental health professional. Talk therapy (or psychotherapy) is a proven treatment for depression. It’s useful for gaining new perspectives and developing new coping skills.
Depression Will Make You A Burden To Others
Being unhealthy and refusing to seek treatment can put pressure and stress on those that care about you, but asking for help does not make you a burden. It makes people feel good to help a loved one, so don’t try to hide what you’re going through from them. What’s most frustrating is when someone needs help, but they refuse to ask for it.
If you (or a man you know) think you might be living with depression, HeadsUpGuys is a website specifically designed to help men fight depression. The site features practical tips, information about professional services and stories of recovery. It also has a self-check that can help determine whether or not depression may be affecting you. Check it out today.
Since recovering from experiences with depression and a suicide attempt in 2010, Joshua R. Beharry has become a passionate advocate for mental health. Josh is currently the project coordinator for HeadsUpGuys, a resource for men in pursuit of better mental health.
If this article helped you and you would like to seek therapy contact MindBeingWell at +1 (678) 250-3093 or go to our website at welltherapy.healthcare. My Blog and Vlogs are independent informative articles. Any donations given to show that you enjoyed the information presented are appreciated ! Make Donations Here~Thanks For Your Support!
If you or someone you know is considering suicide seek help and call the National suicide Prevention Hotline at 1-800-273-8255. If you or someone you know has attempted suicide or has plans to attempt suicide dial 911. If you or anyone that you know is being abused or is a victim of sex trafficking call l-800- 799-SAFE for the National Domestic Violence Hotline. Go to our website for additional mental health resources. # YouAreNotAlone #EndtheStigma
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